Monday, September 29, 2008

Love is a flame...

...a devils thing.


I keep writing the same thing over and over again, don't I? Utterly utterly boring. That's the thing with 'talking'. Once you have said it, then what? That's the problem. Where do you go from there? You are supposed to DO something, ain't you? But I don't know what or how.

I just want peace in my mind. Peace from myself. Peace from the world. I wish I was stupid and ignorant. If I was that, maybe I didn't have to see the things I see. Maybe I could convince myself that there was some sort of point. That life just isn't a period of time to get through. No, that ain't it. Maybe I could enjoy it at least.

People... People are difficult. People say that I am welcome, but it is so hard to feel it.

Trust. Hard to gain, hard to earn, easy to lose. Both mine and others. I rarely give people details that can hurt or compromise me. I guess it also means that people don't give me details.

I don't know. I am utterly bored with the world today. And I don't know what is true or false anymore. But it is OK. I am pretty ok. I think I actually can love again. Thought I had lost it. Or maybe I am just fooling myself right now. I don't care.

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