The Oath

Life's a little better today. A bit. No panic. Well, a little bit. But nothing I can't control. I'm just worried. Not for myself, though. No, I am a bit worried about myself. Recently I have sort been just a jumble of emotional reactions. I don't know if my reactions and actions are emotional responses or rational actions. I always figured that there was some kind of rationality behind most things I did, but this last month my behavious has been a bit too erratic... I'm sorry for that.

Another problem is the fact that I am so tired of getting buttfucked by people trying to sell me shit. A new phone for 1200:- is a pretty good prize, even though I have to tie myself up to one provider for 2 years (pretty good provider, though). So far so good. It is a good phone. What is not good is that if I don't want to pay the whole phone immediately I have to pay between 600:- and 800:- more for the phone. Pisses me of. Sure, I can afford to pay the whole phone right away, but I don't know what shit will show up in the future. I got a computer that I might have to pay to get repaired. I don't know how much work I'll get come next year. I don't know if I got any unpaid taxes.

And still... 1200:- isn't that much money. I blew like twice that on clothes last week. And I need a new phone, because the one I have... Well, lets just say that if you get a text message from me and there are no P's (or too many) in it it's not because I can't spell (although I have some problems in english. I sometimes get 'too' & 'to', 'were' & 'where' confused), it is because my phone is falling to pieces.

Now I am going to watch Sex & The City and eat chocolate.