God, I hate this day. Mostly I hate that I got drunk yesterday and today I got the exact feeling that made me a recluse. The worst part is that I hardly remember anything about yesterday.

I hate this day. I hate myself. All I want to do is just run away from work, but I can't stand going back to the apartment. It just feels so lonely. So fucking deserted.

I just... Everything is so fucked up in me. I just want to break down and cry and just be hugged and just not have to feel awful about being alone and afraid. Not having to be worried about that. Feel like I have something. Truly have something.