I'm worried that I'll turn out to someone I don't like. Or rather to turn out to a worse person. I tell that to people and the say "don't do that." How do I avoid it? I didn't want to be the chickenshit I am today, but I am. Despite all the shit that has happened the last months I still am. I don't know, have I changed any at all?
I hope I can keep this shit up even when this is over. I hope I can walk the line.
I need to learn how to be sociable. And I can't believe that I've only been hit on 3 times during the last 6 years. I must be blind and missed a bunch of girl (and boys). I hope that is it, anyway.
Hell, I'm going to cry at work soon. I hate this. Well, it is nothing I haven't done before.
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